Friday, July 6, 2007
There are no guarantees
The apparent good news keeps coming—Tuesday’s MRI is clear. At least that’s what one of the nurses at the breast center told me today. I’ll believe it next Wednesday when Dr. Nath tells me it’s clear.
When I called for results of the May 2 stereotactic biopsy I was told it was negative. Then, when I went for my follow up with Nath, he said it was negative for what they went in for, but showed two other problems. So it really wasn’t negative. So is this MRI really clear? I’ll wait until Wednesday to be sure.
The Pessimistic Me tells me that this will never really be over, never really be completely and totally gone. I’ll sweat and fret every mammogram for the rest of my life (more so than I do now).
The Optimistic Me tells me that all of the preventive measures to date—such as timely mammograms—have paid off. I’m in a good place and headed in the right direction.
The next big wait will be the results of the sentinel node biopsy. The Optimistic Me says, “Hey, you’ve been OK to this point, why think that might change?”
We’ll wait and see. But I’m not going to sweat and fret quite as much as I might have.
Next stop: Dr. Nath on Wednesday.
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1 comment:
I have never had cancer, although I've had 2 biopsies to R/O some masses and lost my mother and a few other close friends to the disease. What I have learned is that there are no guarantees - death awaits in its own time. The only question is how do I live my life with that kind of 'knowing?' Many expressions speak to this issue (e.g., "carpe diem..."). Still, like you, I complain from time to time when I lose sight of what matters... Perhaps, your posts will inspire me to stay closer to what I know, but have to remind myself of, from time to time... Namaste...
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